WELCOME TO 4 AND 20 SPARROWS! IT IS A BIT OF BLOGGING GOODNESS JUST FOR YOU...FILLED WITH THE RIDICULOUSNESS OF LIFE, MY RANDOM MUSINGS AND THE KNOWLEDGE THAT GOD IS ALWAYS GOOD! COME IN AND ENJOY!

Sunday, April 14, 2013

EPIC UPDATE




By finally accepting the truth that you have abandoned your blog as though it were a fractious and unruly step-child, (as if you were ever capable of such a thing)...*gasp! You come to see that it sits there on the Blog Spot curb; waiting for you, piteous and rain-soaked, and really not fractious at all.
No it is your own unruly, foggy and scattered brain that is the problem. Unfortunately I think I might just qualify for behavioral meds. I have digressed to a span of working memory that lasts up to, and until, there is any quick darting movement or bright shiny objects….
I am actually giving my already taxed synapses a challenge. I am writing this while listening to music**Adele right now. I usually write in silence because listening to music while I try to craft sentences is, for me, like walking and chewing gum….um yeah, not so much. But I thought why not accept the challenge? Who challenged me, you ask? It was the voices……*wink
So I thought I would update anyone who might have even a fleeting interest and still checks in….if you are out there you are a loyal and amazing blog fan!!!! With a list of highlights
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♫♪…….hang onsorry this is my favorite Adele song *pause…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..♫♪
Sorry, so anyway let’s see:
~ My oldest son and his wife had a beautiful baby boy named  Logan Rodney William Willman (he is now 9 months old!)
~They moved back to Medford and broke my heart, but it is mending, because it is what is best for them*pause…………♫………..dang, got lost in the music…………….
♫♪…sorry, sorry!
~I turned 52 in September….SHUT UP!!! I know!!!!
~ I continue to battle the fibro, and it is a sucky, hard battle.
~I have gotten more little bright lights on my brain*pause……♫♪……anyway; though they are shiny and pretty on the MRI they are NOT helpful at all. BUT the good news is that it is not MS, which was the first diagnosis******BTW, to the medical community: DO NOT just GUESS with a diagnosis like MS!!! I lived under that for 4 months until the Neurologist finally saw me and said  “No it is not MS, it is arteriosclerosis of the brain….Oh so much better then,*pause………………………………………………………………………………………………………….♫♪ sorry!!! Adele and I often sing together when no one is around. She works hard to keep me on key and doesn’t criticize.
So these little spots are calcified where little vessels have bled. Little TIA’s??? I dunno, I cannot get a straight answer…but the foggy ‘Aunt Clara’ thinking progresses. I have embraced it now. What the heck, on the bad side I can be easily gas-lighted, on the good side; I just flat out get to say; “Nope sorry I forgot that appointment. Sorry I don’t know….hmm, you may be right.” It feels good, I don’t argue, and takes all of the pressure right off. Plus, at least it makes some kind of sense now. “I’m sorry, have we met???”
~We got a new Puppy!!!!! A little black pug named Ruby!!! Oh my, she is the epitome of quick darting movements, and bright shiny objects! I love her little face!!!
~I seem to have aged a decade in this last big fibro flare-up, but *pause…….♫……~” you know how the time flies; only yesterday was the time of our lives. We were born and raised in a summer haze, bound by the surprised of our glory days…♫” ~Thank you Adele!!! She just reminded me of this. One of my all time pieces of lyrics, and so apropos.
~So; I am way older than I should be now. It was like some kind of horrible ‘beautiful mind’ experiment gone astray. Or like someone cosmically hit the fast forward button on my body in a matter of months. ****♫ now I am listening to David Essex’s amazing 1972 hit “Rock On”*pause……………………. ♫♪…………………………………………… oh my!!!! So faboo! I was such a young school girl then…. I wore that 45 OUT!  Oh I am saying….
~I do not read the scary news anymore…only the headlines. And if North Korea bombs us, I hope it lands in my lap!  HELLO JESUS!!!! *pause........♫♪……Jackson Browne “Doctor My Eyes” *pause………….♪…..

~ Maybe I can write while listening to music after all….or not. But regardless; I am pretty sure this list will not include something of major change and importance, because I simply forgot to remember it….no matter, it’s all good. Tonya Willman ©2013…..♫♪*big pause..........